i’m really interested in the intersection of clothing and spiritual practice. the clothes i choose to wear are important, can be used to help me embody the qualities i want to grow into and remind me in each moment of my practice. the colours i choose, and the way i clothe my body can serve as armor, as protection, as connection to a greater idea. i want to carry reminders of all of these things with me all day. i want to feel wrapped up in my aims towards a higher ideal, protected by them.
all the many buddhas, bodhisattvas, the dharma itself, are described as protectors in the seven fold puja, which is the main ritual practised in the strand of buddhaism i follow.
This very day,
I go for my refuge
To the powerful Protectors,
Whose purpose is to guard the universe,
The mighty conquerors who overcome suffering everywhere.
i’ve always been moved by this verse, felt held by it, and have used that idea to help me make a deeper connection with the different figures. i’ve thought often about ways to carry that feeling of being protected and cared for with me, in physical form. clothing is a strong way to do that. we have such an intimate relationship with our clothes - the fabric presses against skin, closer and for longer than any lover or friend, it absorbs the fluids we extrude, comes to smell like us, mold to our particular shape. in a way, what could be more meaningful and perfect as a symbol of protection and embodying qualities we aspire to, than a piece of clothing?
wearing a piece of clothing that brings a certain buddha to mind, for me, feels like having that buddha with me, protecting, supporting, shielding me against the negative mind states or unskillful behavior i am capable of, gently bringing me back, again and again, to skillfulness, to metta, to the possibility of enlightenment.
it’s also quite a potent metta practise for myself, to make my own clothes, to only listen to what i like and feel comfortable in, rather than looking outwards in search of approval. the more i reflect on clothing and what i like to wear, and how it makes me feel, the less interested in what people think of how i look i become. it’s a really key part of my journey towards becoming a true individual, and not just part of a group. i’m less interested in mirrors and how thin i am not, and more interested in do i feel free in this? do i feel held and protected, do i feel loved by myself in this outfit? how does this outfit support my practice?
i’ve also been reading and studying slow fashion on my own for awhile. this idea of moving away from fast fashion, relentless consumption, forever unsatisfied, towards a slower, more connected, more sustainable relationship with my clothes has really got me interested, and feels like a heartfelt way i can engage with activism. so many of our clothes are made of plastic, bleeding microplastics into the oceans, so much of our clothing is seen as disposable, so much of our clothing is made through modern day slavery. like everything that makes me uncomfortable or angry i want to turn away from it, and refuse to engage with it, but as i wear clothes every day, it’s not something i feel i can ignore. starting to make some of my own clothes, in a mindful, aware way, buying second hand or from uk based businesses, feel like positive actions i can take, that i can also weave into my own practice, and create a deeper personal meaning from.
clothes have such power.
i remember my nan making me dresses when i was small - most notably a bridesmaids dress when i was obsessed with being a bridesmaid (i’ve still never been a bridesmaid). i remember feeling like a beautiful princess. i still vividly remember that dress, each layer of fabric, the shine of the silk, the lace and puff sleeves. it had a separate under dress with tulle layers. in remembering that dress i can connect to the positive feelings i had around it. even clothing that doesn’t exist anymore has power.
for years now, since joining buddhafield, clothing has been a part of how i practiced, quite subtly at first, without me even realizing it, but becoming more and more important as my practice went deeper. before the project came together in my head, i knew i wanted to make 5 dresses, each one the color of a different buddha. i think almost, the project emerged as a container to hold me while i made these dresses.
the process
last year, while staying with my nan, and caring for her, i had a free afternoon, and spent it walking to her local high street to have a look in the charity shops. i found a bright yellow flowered bed sheet for a pound, and brought it home, knowing i wanted to wear it.
last year i also took a clothes making course called ‘softwork’, about how to make your own clothing, based around a zero waste ideal (so lots of squares and rectangles), and an aim to make clothes that didn’t restrict the body. the ratnasambhava dress is based on skills i learnt on that course - a rectangle of fabric folded in half, with a head hole for the top, and two gathered rectangles for the skirt. the base for the top pattern was made through holding fabric against me, marking points, joining them up, seeing how they felt, shifting if needed. a dance between body and hands, rather than measuring body parts and reducing them to pencil lines. the whole course felt organic, a conversation between my body and the clothes i was learning how to make.
i wanted the dress, and the ones to follow to be made totally by me, i didn’t want to follow a pattern, so i decided to use the skills i’d learnt on the course. i wanted to feel joyful, free wearing it, so i chose to make it oversized, quite loose, and with a lot of fabric in the skirt - i wanted to be able to twirl!
don’t forget to check out my etsy shop, i’ve got lots of ratnasambhava inspired things there :)
t.i.l.l - things i loved lately.
loving this blog post by give her pockets, titled ‘Sew Politik- why we need to understand sewing as a political act, and why it matters’. lots of ideas in here to fuel my reflections and my actions: clothing as violence by colonial rulers, clothing as acts of resistance by enslaved people, quilting and slavery…. i feel my own creative practice will be hugely influenced by the path of research, reflection and action by some of the ideas in this essay.
as a knitter i love the website, modern daily knitting, there are articles sharing inspiration and projects in progress, a letters series that has gone on for years between two of the key writers, and, my favourite, articles explaining techniques in depth. for some knitting things i now know why it works that way, rather than just knowing that it works. so satisfying. i really enjoyed this article, the first of three, which is about use of colour, colour theory, and how we can use colour. it’s relevant and interesting for anyone i think.
got this book, the curated wardrobe, from my library, and it’s been really interesting to go on a bit of a deep dive into what’s in my drawers, how much i wear it, and what styles resonate with me. i’ve been making some other clothes other than the ratnasambhava dress, and this book has helped me narrow down what to sew next.
finally, just a general shout out to libraries everywhere. they’ve been such a point of stability and refuge in my life! one of the first things i do when moving anywhere new is to check out where the nearest library is. i also don’t think i would have got through early motherhood without having access to a library app on my phone, so i could read without having to worry about late fines, and actually getting it together to get out of the house to get books. reading is a really really important activity to me, and libraries facilitate that. heartful thanks to those who run them.
been reading marlee grace’s newsletter, and they always end with a series of blessings, which i love, so here are mine:
may you flourish this new moon, may you find ease and rest. may you feel protected and held, may you feel loved. may you open to new seeds taking root, expand and rise into beauty. may you feel full of joy. may life bring you all that you need.
love ruth